Sometimes I forget things that I've known all my life.
"Some fresh air will do you good."
I think that as a child I thought that meant I should go away and leave someone alone and entertain myself for a while.
In my Very Adult Life I don't have time to entertain myself for a while and there's too much work just to go away. So I forget that getting fresh air renews my spirit and clears my head and strengthens my body. I forget that if I go away and come back I'll have new eyes and new energy to do all that Very Important Work.
"You'll feel better after you rest."
I know that as a child I thought that meant that whatever I was feeling was not real, but just a response to being tired.
Now I'm tired a lot of the time. Those feelings that might get better if I rest are pretty much constantly with me, and they feel very real. I force myself to rest because of obligations and discipline, not because I expect to feel better in the morning.
But if I do get fresh air, and if I do rest, I really do feel better. This morning I woke up so heavily burdened that my greatest wish was to run away. No, I don't run, I stay and fight. I don't quit. But my world felt endlessly dark and just to move took all my effort.
Enter God (and my husband, God's gift to me).
I had to go get milk for breakfast. Obligation. Duty. Work. I headed out the door, and hubby tagged along because he knew I felt bleh. Very bleh. We went together through the darkness to the grocery store. Outside my conscious awareness my spirit began moving toward the dance floor where I dance in the joy of The Lord. As we left the grocery store, the new day was officially dawning, and the most beautiful pink sunrise was covering half the sky.
How could I have forgotten? He loves me, and each of us, so much that He gives us a sunrise every day. If I'll just get some fresh air - His air - and rest in Him, I can walk lightly and even dance in the midst of any trouble or trial.
I must remember.
And then I must choose to do something about it.
Thank you, God, for fresh air and rest, and for making me weak enough to need those so that I'll remember how much I need You.